Is it okay for a girl to take the initiative when a guy she has a crush on is slow to approach?

With the progress of the times, the concept of gender is becoming more and more equal, and most people are becoming more and more accepting of girls taking the initiative, but it is still difficult for girls to get rid of the thinking that “too much initiative is not good” and “be more reserved”. If one day you really meet a boy you like, but he is slow to approach, how to take the initiative in style without losing face?

Before a girl takes the initiative, she should first understand the reasons why men are passive.

When you meet each other and develop a good feeling, you will more or less rehearse your inner little theater. Suppose you attend a common friend’s party together, among the many familiar and new faces on the scene, your eyes meet by chance, and then wait for each other to come, and start rehearsing the scene of the two talking in your head, but with the passage of time, in addition to the occasional eye contact, the imagined scene of the conversation did not happen.

As a girl, you may be waiting and thinking to yourself, “He obviously noticed me, why didn’t he come over and talk to me? Or perhaps, girls often interpret a guy’s lack of initiative as a sign that he doesn’t want to get to know me. But in fact, the other person may also have many preconceived notions in mind, especially for men who are shy or have low self-confidence, and will try to figure out if they go over to you to talk to you, will people feel like they’re hitting on you? Would it be embarrassing to be rejected? What if your appearance is not your favorite type? Will they make you feel like a boring person as soon as they open their mouths?

From “expecting” to get to know each other – “hoping” that the other person will be interested in you – “imagining” the scene of communication between the two, after such a flow of emotions, in fact, appears as an “unknown preliminaries”, back to the reality of the level of lack of self-confidence, fear of self-esteem damage to the small theater, the lack of certainty of various preconceived notions, and ultimately lead to the main reason for men to become passive. This is the main reason why men become passive.

The significance of a girl taking the initiative is to “let the guy know he won’t be rejected”.

In other words, most of us have the image of men as brave and fearless initiators, but men can be shy and hesitant, especially if they are not sure how you feel about them, or if they don’t get the signal that you want to approach them. Therefore, this is where your actions can be the key.

Unlike men who take the initiative in a more direct way, the meaning of a girl’s initiative is to “assist” by naturally revealing the hint of “I have a good feeling about you”, helping the guy to unload his “fear of rejection”, so he dares to take the initiative to get closer to the girl, and then let the two of them create a connection.

If you already have a target you want to get to know, whether in real life or through social media interactions, you can help a man to remove his fear of being rejected by using these tips, so that he can feel more comfortable approaching the girl. Here are three key points to help you practice:

Girls take the initiative to focus on 1: active conversation and physical contact, to enhance each other’s favorability

Assuming that you are aware of each other, exchanged contact “initial acquaintance” people, will pay attention to each other’s community dynamics, sometimes send messages to each other, or have the opportunity to further meet alone to have dinner, then you should pay attention to the place for:

– Interact with each other as your true self

Don’t present yourself in a way that isn’t true to yourself in order to cater to the other person, such as showing that you have good fitness habits even though you hate exercise, which can lead to a negative impression when the other person realizes that you don’t have such a lifestyle.

When you talk to each other, you can generously tell your true thoughts, share the people and things you have met in your life, and what touches you. You don’t have to reveal your deepest darkness, but rather, you can use the phrase “I’ve encountered these things, what would you do if you were in this situation? Let the other party participate in the discussion, do the ball to the other party to share his thoughts, so that he can feel your trust in him, the importance of his ideas, as well as you want to know more about his atmosphere, so that the frequency of both sides slowly close.

– Moderate physical proximity creates intimacy

When getting along face-to-face, please use the current situation to “make use of your strength.” Take dinner as an example, when “sharing food” during the meal, take the initiative to ask him if he wants to taste the meal he ordered, and if the other party has the will to do so, you can then ask, “Do you mind if I cut it for you? This is a good time to look at each other’s reactions and test the degree of intimacy between the two.

Remember to gaze into each other’s eyes when chatting, let your body slightly incline towards each other at the right point in time, and listen carefully when the other person is speaking, in addition to bringing the other person the feeling of being valued, it also implies that you have an interest in him.

When you have the opportunity to walk and chat together, you can accidentally touch each other’s arms while walking, and then slowly pull away naturally to show your favor to him without any trace, but without being too pretentious and giving people the feeling that you are very casual.

Girls Take the Initiative #2: Let Social Media Posts Help You “Express Your Feelings” to Him Without Traces

If you have already joined each other’s social media accounts, you can try to think of what you want the other person to know about you through this poo article, such as: interests and hobbies, attitudes and personalities, tastes and perspectives, and interesting facts about your life, etc., and then start with these levels.

The main thing is to let the other person understand and participate in your life little by little, so that he can have the curiosity of “feeling like I know a little bit, but also wanting to know you better”, which is a way to get closer to each other.

– In addition to letting the other person get to know you better, posting is also a source of inspiration for them to find topics to interact with you!

The following are sample sentences. After reading them, try to think of what thoughts and behaviors the other person would think and do after reading your text, and then think about what you want to “hint” at each time you send a message.

“Cooking makes me feel good, and it’s a great way to get rid of work fatigue and prepare a meal for my family.”

“When a friend tells me about her recent troubles, I not only worry and give her some advice, but also keep her company.”

“I’m in a good mood after hearing an album with an energizing rhythm.”

“I’m having a hard time at work today, but I’ll try to find a way to make it better. I’ll try my best.”

These example sentences are the preconceptions that cause the other party to respond and create psychological expectations. When the other party notices that the content of the post mentions music and cakes, they can easily find the entry point of the topic and look for an opportunity to recommend your good music or afternoon tea restaurant, which will open up the dialog smoothly and begin to generate communication and interaction.

– Make good use of social networking features such as likes, comments and messages to generate communication.

If the other person also sends articles to relieve their feelings and share information, please click on your empathetic approval, or leave a modest message to write down your thoughts. This small gesture also represents “caring” and lets the other person know that you are interested in interacting with them, and then advances to private messaging to do the interaction, so there will be no sense of disconnection.

The key point of female initiative 3: “assist” at the same time, do not forget to take the initiative to grasp the right proportion

– Leave a hint that you can go out on a date and become an opportunity for an assist.

If you want to extend an invitation to your partner, try asking them what they like to do on the weekends, find out what they are interested in, and tell them that they are interested in you too.

Assuming that the guy likes watching movies, traveling, watching baseball games, and reading, and that you like watching movies and baseball games, you can preview this week’s or upcoming movies or baseball games, ask the other person what movie lists they have recently or what sports games they want to watch, and disclose that if you have the time, you can meet up with them together, which is a great way to take the initiative that if the guy really means it, he will definitely take advantage of it.

– Take the initiative and set a good stopping point

The point of taking the initiative is to “leave space for the other party to react”, don’t deliberately contact or send messages every day, a moderate blank can cause the other party to have a higher sense of anticipation, so that he has the opportunity to self-presentation and thinking, and look for opportunities to communicate with you.

If you try to do the ball to each other many times, but the other party seldom respond carefully, often read not to return or “hmmm, right ah, maybe” briefly pass the conversation, then it is recommended to set a stop point, do not have to spend more effort.

Understanding the psychology and reasons for men’s passivity and finding the right proactive approach for yourself will make you more comfortable in taking action! Remember to (1) show your true self, (2) moderately suggest to the other party that “you want to further interact with him,” (3) create opportunities for the other party to dare to invite him generously, and (4) grasp a good balance and set up a stopping point. Grasp these principles, and you will be able to choose the most appropriate mode of interaction between you and the object of your affection, which will lead to the possibility of a more in-depth development of your relationship.

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